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Friday, May 9, 2008

Little Girls In My Shoes

Summer is supposed to be here, right there and right then. It has been a very nice few days filled with warmth, joyful and happiness these past few days. And I couldn't stop wondering, until when it is going to be as peaceful as it is. Would it be raining tomorrow? Would it be back to it's normal kind of weather, like the way it is used to be?

Walking back home, I was in my suit with a pair of skirt and heels. It was way to unbelievable how the pain on my toes, shrieking quietly to my ear, "you stupid little girl... it is way to painful down here, stucked in this stupid heels you are wearing!!" I have decided to wear an office attire, completely to the office today, just because I feel like it.

I have to admit, I am a bit selfish to myself, not thinking about how my pair of feet would think of that. Heels have always been a torture to me, no matter how good it looks. Hence, I still have loads of pairs, patterned beautifully on the shoe rack in my home. It is too nice, to look up those pairs, in the shoe shop, portraying themselves... "pick me, pick me!!" through the front glass of the shoe shop. It's unbearable! That obviously verifies numerous collections I have, at the moment. *wink*

It was not too bad today, a good sunny day but not as good as today, or as the day before... It is just okay. I keep on walking, and the 'little girls' in my shoes keep on shrieking, drumming in my ears. Then, I couldn't help but wondering... It is too painful to walk miles, with a pair of heels, but most of the women nowadays seem to not bothered at all by the fact that their 'little girls' are shrieking, seeking for help, probably suffocating or perhaps some of them need to be towed to the critical unit emergency room.

Is that considered normal? Is that how norms nowadays reacted? And basically, treated this as one of the tiny matters among all big problems that have ever existed? Would that be classified as a routine of life, things we do and have in our everyday life? Will that not be actually known as torturing yourself, that soon it can somehow put you in a risk of becoming handicapped?

I had few thoughts on, and it does scare me eventually. If we do walk in heels for at least, 5 days a week, for... say, 2 hours each day... and that accumulate to approximately 40 hours per month... and about 60 hours per year, will that not give you higher risk of having fractured toe bones?

When I was flipping the images on my head, I suddenly realized...

It is a fact. A problem will always be a problem if we see it as one, but will not eventually become one when we just don't be bothered about it. Theoretically speaking, I am stomping on my wild side of agenda right now. I have been bothered with my sappy love life scenario without ends to it, and obviously without sense. I have been bothered with the 'how is it going to be' equations every now and then. And until now, I just couldn't fit in the last puzzle of whiz. I could not even lay the final presentation with all the trusted evidence I have, and I could not even put up the mix with the perfect combination of ingredients on hand... I just could not. It is simply because, I am seeking for it. I am wishing on stars to have it all happen as it is supposed to be...

It is always been right to every other person in this world, but somehow it does not blooms out beautifully when it comes to mine. Does that have something to do with me, or it was just them?
Most of the girls that I know, happily married and have kids around them. Does that means they are luckier than me? Or do they just fit in the places to make themselves happy and settled but in fact they are not really as happy as they want to be? Do I basically being to picky and always drooled over some stupid jerks that ended up having sort of cliche love scene over and over again?

However, I found out that few of my ex-es are somehow, have a beautiful life and settled with someone at the moment. Then somehow, I have another thought in my head and it does scare me.

Was it them who brings the problem to all the relationship that I have had that ended up crashing badly in the middle of the journey, or is it me?

Am I actually the one, the wild orchid stuffed with one humongous petal spelled "say no to commitment"?

9 twirls with baby:

70steen on May 9, 2008 at 7:07 AM said...

woh so many different things here .. I was focused on the shoe thing and the pain come summer and skirts and better footwear.. then I read on

stop analysing things (I know I have always done the same and too many years later realise I shouldn't have)
Live for the day and what will be will be.
I am so much older and hate to admit I have got wiser (It is an admission of my age god forbid!)
But I know you will be fine you will meet the right bloke and even if you don't you will have fun finding out (better to be on your own and happy than with some one you are committed to but unhappy)
The key to stuff is be happy with yourself then everything falls into place ....

Daddy Papersurfer on May 9, 2008 at 2:33 PM said...

70's wiser!!!!!! - well, she might be I suppose - tee hee.

'The key to stuff is be happy with yourself then everything falls into place ....' - she's right [but do ignore the structure of the sentence and lack of punctuation - tee hee again.]

70steen on May 9, 2008 at 3:12 PM said...

I am wiser than I was as a teen ... just as well really .....
na na na na .... who called the grammar cops ?? lol :-)

shle3pyb4by on May 9, 2008 at 8:37 PM said...

70steen... yeah. about to get to my senses now. hehehe...

thanks anyway! :) **koala hugs**

70steen on May 10, 2008 at 7:29 AM said...

good girl **eagle hugs** back ... ermmmm can eagles hug ?? lol :-)

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